I'm surprisingly normal about the whole thing. I either have vast reserves of inner strength, am totally numb, or was just expecting this to happen eventually; i think it's a combination of the first and the last. I howled last evening like i have never howled over anybody. I howled like somebody close to me had died, somebody or something.
But you know what? It's never going to die. It's going to be caged and under the scrutiny of a very serious ring master.
I think deep down, i was hoping you would look past the things i told you and... yes, well. I still feel the urge to fight for you. Fight against your unwillingness to consider yourself in the equation, your belief - that line you keep feeding yourself - that "it's too late" or "it's not going to happen".
I have a weird feeling that our paths are going to cross again. I only hope that when they do, you'll be ready. Because what we have - not had - is something that was meant to happen.
This one's for you. For us.
To the mystery of the future. To an extraordinary...love.
