Conversation.

*Tring Tring*

Oh, sorry. Wrong beginning.

*Vibraaaate vibrate!*

"Hello?"
"Kya hai bey kuttey?"
"Bhak saaley"
"Bhak madar****"
"Bhak t*** m** k*"
"Bhak cho**"
"Chup bey madar****"
"Chup bey l****"
"G*** mara bey b***** ke"
"Tu mara bey b***** pappu"
"Achcha waisey phone kyun kiya?"
"Aisey hi, gaaliyan dene ke liye."
"Oh achcha, theek hai. Ho gaya na? Chal abhi rakh."
"Rakh l****, rakh."
"Tu rakh bhen****"
"Haan theek hai. Kutta saala."
"Chup bey madar****."
"Haan theek hai, chal bye."
"Haan bye."

By far, one of the most fun and dirty conversations i have had in a really long time.

Oh, which reminds me (actually, 'dirty' reminds me), my friend G called this morning. Like his calling itself wasn't an event, he called at 3:40 a.m. Trying to go all husky and sexy on me saying, "I just felt like waking you up from your sleep." And then he offered to hang up - an offer that wasn't genuine, of course, but i took it up anyway because i was dying to curl up and go back to bed. And he went all abusive and tried dirty talking, which of course didn't work either because all the dirty talk we have is because of the lack of better things to talk about. Besides, he thinks he's this complete stud, so there's not much one can do except ask him to go get his job done somewhere else. All said and done, though, he's the one i talk to when i need serious advise - and one that makes sense.

So anyway, after i went to sleep, i had two very bizarre dreams - one of which i screamed my lungs out in, in absolute mental distress because a bunch of security guards were giving me a lot of unnecessary grief about a parcel. And the other one in which it seemed like all the world's zoos were let loose and animals were as free to move around as people. So there were snakes hanging down from trees like branches, sharp-eyes crocs doing the rounds in drains and sewers while ocassionally putting their heads out on to the roads to survey their chances of food, monkeys (like we don't have enough of the two-legged kind already) and God-knows-what-else.

Between yesterday and today, these are the interesting things that have happened to me so far. The fact that i'm sitting with my nose covered because S at work is giving out acidic fumes of body odour, is not something we need to get into details about. Sometimes i think he wears that smell with pride - some mad scientist (remember Roald Dahl's Bitch?) must have told him that the scent will unknowingly creep up into women's nostrils and attract them to him like moths to a lamp. Tch tch. What these young boys won't do for Lays these days. (Oh my go, it rhymes. It rhymes!)