So this is how easy starting over is.

I came back from a week in Leh on Saturday. Anything i say about the place won't come close to what it really is. And it's supremely beautiful in every way.

I went with 15 other women, all of them total strangers brought together by Women on Wanderlust. It was a great experience. I made new friends, had loads of fun and was glad that i was with a group of women who were mostly non-bitchy and non-political but so game to change plans and try new things.

It was like starting a new life. Starting over. I didn't want to hear from anybody back home. I didn't think of the life that existed, waited for me back in Bangalore. I only called my parents. I had no desire to talk to anybody else. I wanted to be nobody's shoulder to cry on, ray of hope, or world of love. I wanted to be, for me. I didn't think. Imagine that! I didn't THINK! I was lost in the scenic beauty of Leh. There was no work, no love, no worry, no stress, nothing. Just taking the day as it comes; having fun didn't take any effort. And that's when i realised that it would be so easy to let go of everything, of everyone. It would probably be a good thing too, because Leh healed me in ways i didn't think was possible. It did so much good to me without my realising it.

I hate being back. I've had severe fits of anger already, and fights that could have been avoided. But it's true. I still want my escape. I want it to last longer. I don't want to get back to my life. I'm being forced to, but bloody hell i'm going to put up a fight.