Why she is my best friend.

On a guy who kinda broke my heart, but not really.

Me: hey
She: what?
Me: let me send you link to *beep beep beep*'s pics. (Name aliased for privacy reasons
She: ok
Me: (sending link)
She (immediately): pathetic
dude that can't be *beep beep beep*
is it?
the guy with the *beep* (describing a facial feature)
dude?!!!!!!!!!
Me: yeah
it is him
She: eeeeeeeuuuuuuuu
Me: :)
oh please
he's not so bad
She: he is so uncle type da
Me: he's quite good-looking
She: how the *beep* did you find this guy hot?!!!!!
what's wrong with you dude!?
Me: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
i find your reaction very funny
:))
She: horrible horrible...
i would've died if you were seeing him
Me: he's not bad
She: shut up
yeah actually you're right
he isn't bad
he is pathetic
OMG
i will kill you if you find someone like that for yourself
you get it?
Me: ha ha ha ha ha ha
alright alright calm down
She: stop laughing
i'm super serious
i don't believe this man
Me: CALM DOWN woman! I was not dating him!
She: ok
thank god for small mercies.
(Disclaimer: More controversial bits of the conversation have been deleted for fear of a lawsuit from the aforementioned guy or his better half.)